Self help

Overcoming Anxiety: How Solutions Change Your Mindset

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It may seem an obvious notion that by finding solutions to our problems we would immediately start to relieve worry and anxiety that can build up in us over time. However, for many suffering with anxiety often all we can see are the problems, and the idea of finding a solution can sometimes seem insurmountable.

The important thing to be aware of here is that when we look to find a solution, however big or small, we switch to a more positive part of our brain, the pre-frontal cortex. This is the part that is unique to humans, and where we are at our best. It is very difficult to feel both stressed and anxious while be completely present in thinking of ways to make solutions.

Think about that for a moment!

We can be anxious one minute, think of a solution and then go back to feeling anxious, but what we can’t do is feel both at the same time. The more time we spent focusing on thinking of solutions, the more time we spend away from our anxious feelings. Then when we find a solution and apply it, we have achieved something that makes us feel good.

So, with this information we learn that it is sensible to dedicate some time each day to sit down, break down our problems and try and come up with a solution. We may know what we want to achieve ultimately, but what we don’t sometimes apply is the idea that when problems are too large, we may need several steps to break this down, and so part of the solution might be just a very small thing that leads to the ultimate resolution.

If you are having trouble with this process, Solution Focused Therapy or Counselling is a very useful modality in which you can start this process for yourself. Solution Focused Therapy uses a variety of techniques, tools and questions that help refocus the mind to help you step away from your problems. Over time and with practise this then becomes your new normal.

Sounds like you?

Reach out and take the first step on the journey to finding your resolution.

New year resolutions and the power of positivity

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Now that we have entered a new year in the light of the difficulties, we have all experienced over the course of the last year, so much hope is being placed on the importance of our health, personal relationships and mental health. This of course is the time we often re-evaluate our lives and challenge ourselves to be different and take a different course in the new year to the one that went before. It is an opportunity to wipe the slate lean and start again.

We draft our list, sometimes it’s a long list of hopes, and sometimes we come up with just one wish, be it giving up alcohol, start a fitness regime, making time to see more friends. At the core of all these new resolutions that we draft up, is the inner wish to want to make things different and better for ourselves. But for so many these resolutions last a few days, weeks if we are lucky. The trouble is we intellectually want the change, but often we don’t have the true desire to see it through.  This is the point where thinking in a positive way can make a world of difference to our success or failure in our pursuit of change.

If we look at why positive thinking is so important to everything we do, first we must understand the mind body connection.  If I were to describe to you a vivid description, while your eyes are closed, of holding a lemon, and getting you to imagine I that you were cutting up the lemon and putting a fresh slice into your mouth, and squeeze some lemon juice onto your tongue. I would be surprised if you didn’t find that your mouth would start to water even though the reality is that there is no lemon in sight. This because the primitive mind doesn’t know the difference between imagination and reality. What you tell your mind it starts to believe, and it has the ability and to trigger the chemical reactions it needs to ensure it is prepared to taste the sour lemon. The same is true for stress, or negative thinking. If we tell ourselves constantly things will go wrong or if we give our mind a reason for something to go wrong, the mind will look for ways to ensure that it will.

So, how does this relate to our resolutions? It’s quite simple, we need to not only tell our minds what we want, but we need to be positive that we will succeed.  if we tell our mind we are committed to the change we want to see, and really imagine this deeply with as much detail as possible, we can build and grow the desire to see out this change. The more we re-enforce what we want and infuse it with positivity we tell the part of our mind that runs the old negative patterns that hold us back that our new path is our what we truly desire. We literally grow new cells in our brain that wire a new pattern. The more we stick with the pattern with desire determination and positivity, the more likely the change will stick for the long term.

As a hypnotherapist, my role is to support the conscious will of the intellectual mind to convince the subconscious mind that any change is worth making. Trance simply stops opens up the barrier that prevents an alliance between the two and facilitates a strengthening of will to take the direction that the intellectual mind wants, reprogramming negative beliefs that are held at a subconscious level and creating new positive beliefs that represents the solutions you want to see.

Whether you have stuck with your resolutions, or you are needing help, I hope positivity can be the key to your overall success.

Best Wishes.

Craig

Coping with Covid-19 during Winter – Self Help Strategies

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These past months have been a great challenge for all us. We have had to cope with the loss of many of the things we have previously taken for granted. The company of others being a major one, and that is not with-standing the fear that the word Covid-19 strikes in many of us, in relation to our own health, or those of ones we love.

I myself have at times found my mind wandering into the realms of fear, placing my mind into the what ifs, and what might never happen mode. By returning to the present moment, and filling it with positive things, it allows me to centre myself. The following list of things, has empowered me to regain control, feel happier and able to bring balance to my own situation and I hope it can work for you too.

Regular Exercise

With the likes of Joe Wicks and Major Tom Moore, there has been plenty of inspiration to keep us moving over the summer months, both of these amazing individuals have shown that with positive thoughts and positive actions incredible things can be achieved, but as we enter Winter, and whilst we all cannot achieve the recognition those gentleman have, it shows us that things can be it still be achieved by people of all ages and that regular exercise remains as important as ever. We all know that physical activity is a great way of keeping our bodies healthy, but what is often forgotten or neglected is the importance it has on our Mental Health, keeping active helps us produce Serotonin, along with other feel good chemicals, that keep us calm and balanced and feeling braver and more in control.

Routine

By keeping a routine, we keep a purpose and motivation to carry on day to day. By having a routine, it informs our brain of our intentions, and if our intentions are positive, this allows us to feel positive.

Talking to others

Find a way to talk to those you love, this can be over the phone, Zoom calls, or maybe even writing to someone you love. (Look for the positives, think in a positive way).

Make laughter a way to be

Why not put on your favourite comedy shows and sit and enjoy and laugh. Laughing this helps boost our mood as well as helping us to relax.

Help others (interact in a positive way)

Helping others is known to give us a warm sense of purpose and helps us produce and release feel good chemicals in our brains. So not only do we feel good for doing something for someone else, that someone else gets to benefit too.

Appreciate what you do have (Gratitude)

This may seem and obvious thing to do, but so many of us can get caught up in focusing on what don’t have or what we appear we have lost, we forget to take the time in our daily routine to stop and reflect on what it is we do have, and to give thanks for this. Once again by thinking in a positive way we retrain our brain over time to look for all the things in life that are good for us. Our brains operate in a happier and more fulfilled and purposeful way when we train ourselves to give thanks, be it big or small, it all counts.

Meditation practises

If we try to keep our minds in the present moment, it can help our minds from wandering off into a cycle of negative thinking. Negative thoughts are heard by our subconscious mind, and it is here where we produce the wide variety of chemicals in our brains. If we think negative, we trigger the reactions that can lead to depression or anxiety, so it makes sense to try to avoid this way of thinking if possible.

Ways we can do this include;

  • Exercise
  • Reading
  • Gardening and or connecting with nature
  • Playing a Musical Instrument
  • Sitting quietly, focusing on you something you enjoy and holding that thought for as long as you can.
  • Listening to relaxing music, or a Hypnotherapy relaxation track.

Learn Something new

Use the lockdown time to learn something new, or revisit something you have loved doing in the past but not had the time.

Most of all try to enjoy the Yuletide and Christmas period as much as you can, it’s a great time for appreciating life, and reflecting on what we would like life to look like in the future.

From all at Illuminating Minds have a very Happy and Healthy Christmas and a Wonderful New Year

How to cope with Exam and Work Stress

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The exam season is about to hit, and for many school children this can be a time of great anxiety and stress. A little bit of stress can be a good thing, and can help motivate us to achieve our goals, however for some this can become over-whelming, derailing our best efforts and stopping us from performing at our highest levels.

Exams themselves, don’t cause the anxiety. When we break it down, we realise that an exam is just simply a task that needs to be completed.  However, it’s the tricks that our mind can play on us, that can then cause the fear of the exam itself. This is an important realisation, because once we are aware of this, we understand that it is within ourselves that we can find the answer to the problem that we have created. This may sound harsh but its important that we realise that we are the captain of our own ship and can control the way we think about situations and events in our lives.

The great news is that you can take back control of the situation

Here in Dorset, I help people overcome the anxieties that surround exams and performance. The fact is that exam stress is the same as the stress suffered by those performing on the stage, or in Sport. It is grouped and labelled ‘performance anxiety’ and individuals can suffer to such an extent they are unable to think clearly. When we are stressed, we use the primitive parts of our brain. This area is designed to protect us from danger. This is a great thing when we encounter potential threats to our safety such as when a wasp buzzes around our head. We pump out hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline that help us to react quickly. Unfortunately, it can stop us from using the parts of our brain that allow us to perform well in exams.

Having been a teacher, I appreciate how difficult it can be for children to deal with exams. All you want for our developing children is to be able to express what they can do, when they want or need to be able to do it!

The following is a list of ways to reduce stress

  • One of the biggest ways you can reduce stress is to try and avoid those around you who are showing signs of stress. The reason for this is that stress can be contagious, and we mirror this when we are around people, in the same way that a smile can be contagious or even a yawn.
  • Another way you can help your stress levels is by keeping a calm environment to work or study in, perhaps having a plant in your study space.
  • Also make sure you have plenty of fresh food in the house, and ensure you sip plenty of water or drinks during the day to stay hydrated and keep your brain alert and functioning to its maximum.
  • Try to keep your study or work area decluttered, and use calming essential oils such lavender. You can also use Rosemary or Peppermint as these have been used for thousands of years as an aid to improve memory.
  • Try to limit time on social media, this not only stops you from wasting valuable time when you could be studying or working, it also can help reduce anxiety. Social media can be known to increase anxiety, especially if someone you know is spreading the panic online.
  • Also be aware that going analogue can be detrimental to learning. When you write information down, it lights up different pathways in the brain that aid learning and memory recall. For those of a creative personality you can use mind mapping techniques to build patterns of information that help you recall information and can be more fun to do.
  • Don’t forget to take regular breaks. Get outside and get some fresh air, its important to allow the brain time to consolidate what you have learnt.
  • Get some exercise, this way you can release feel good endorphins and help to relieve the symptoms of anxiety.
  • Get plenty of sleep, this is where most of your learning is processed into your long-term memory. Make the most of this, and let your brain recover for the next day.
  • Be positive and visualise yourself doing well. Your mind doesn’t know the difference between imagination and reality, so instead of telling yourself you feel nervous, tell yourself ‘I feel excited’ or ‘I am well prepared for these exams’. The more you practise and imagine yourself in a relaxed state in the exam, the mind can then prepare the body for this.

One of the most important things to remember is that many of the most successful people in the world weren’t particularly academic. Leonardo Da Vinci for example didn’t have what we would call a formal education, and he didn’t do too badly!

Exams are a good way to test our ability to memorise information, and our ability to cope under pressure, but what they can’t do is test somebody’s entrepreneurial spirit, musical or sporting skills or capacity to be kind or indeed their common sense!

Illuminating Minds Hypnotherapy

If despite the above advice you are still feeling anxious about your up-coming exams, here at Illuminating Minds we use proven Hypnotherapy techniques to help an individual to regain the calm and balance required to perform at their best. So often we are taught how to observe and learn and be active, but what we aren’t always shown is how to be calm and rest the mind. There is a strong learning benefit in being calm. In my sessions I explain how anxiety is a process that can build up over time.  I use a stress bucket as a metaphor to show how anxiety and worries accumulate over time. This is where we store all our anxious thoughts in a queue waiting to be processed. During REM sleep we process our anxieties, removing the emotional negative parts.  But if we have too much to process, the quality of our sleep can suffer, and we get caught in a vicious circle of sleep deprivation and heightened anxiety. Hypnosis or trance breaks this circle by simulating REM sleep and can help us process our worries and empty our stress bucket. It can also help us to focus and visualise how we want things to go during our exams or at work in a calm and methodical way.

If you feel Hypnotherapy could be of benefit and you would like to learn more,  contact Illuminating Minds now and we can start getting you back in control and on a path to your own success.